My mom came to visit for a short time this week. She came to help with the move and with the baby so that I could have more time to heal and not overwork myself. It was really nice having her here, as it usually is. I was able to get the rest I needed yet we were also able to get a lot of things checked off of our overwhelming list. I say overwhelming because we needed to fix the water filtration system to the house, move some large items that belong to our friends from the upstairs of the house to the loft above their garage, move boxes upstairs, start to unpack, move the old dryer out of the laundry room and replace them with our washer and dryer, fix the tractor, and mow the lawn. All of this needed to be done as soon as possible (like before the end of the weekend kind of soon) and without my help since every time I overexert myself I set back my healing by a few days. Thankfully with the help of my mon we were able to get everything on the list done except fixing the tractor and moving all the boxes upstairs (although to be fair my mom moved over half of them). My stress level is greatly decreased.
I wish my mom could be here more often. Not just because she is a huge help, but because I really enjoy having her around (even though I spend a great deal of time fussing at her). We are at a point in our relationship where we are trying to navigate from being mother/daughter to being adult/adult. I know that I have this need to prove to people that I am a grownup who can do things on my own, and I know my mom likes to help however she can. Its really sweet and I really appreciate it, but for some reason I take her help personally. It’s nothing that she is doing wrong because she isn’t, she’s being fantastic. I am reading it as though she is telling me she wants to fix what I am not doing right, which C has made pretty clear to me isn’t the case. I want people to see our finished product of where we are going but until then there are times when things are gonna get hairy, and that’s ok. It’s ok if my mom other people or sees those parts of our life. This isn’t where we are going to end up forever, this is just a temporary stay, and if people want to judge us for it then that’s their problem not mine and I need to stop feeling bad about it.
